Do I Really Have to Care About Myself?

              

               I totally underestimate the importance of self-care. I want to apologize to my readers, but I had to take a couple of days off to care for myself. My body began to show me that I was being neglectful, and it was time to do some self-care. So, I want to share with others, especially those of us who are caretakers, the importance of tending to self.

               After my son was injured, I have placed all of my focus on caring for him. He is a baby and his needs rest upon my shoulders. I do not know any other way to function. I love the idea of getting a massage, mani and pedi, but there is never any time. My son has had to visit a plethora of doctors, along with receiving occupational, physical, and speech therapy on a regular basis. I just want to see him healthy and functioning normally.

               However, I have not been doing well. I have noticed that I am extremely fatigued most of the time. I found a moment to go to the doctor because I was really concerned about this, but thankfully there are no medical problems that attribute to it. Still, I have had no motivation to do anything. I am not eating often enough, which probably contributes to the fatigue. Mentally, I have felt like I am at my wits end trying to keep up with litigation, appointments, home therapy, meals, bills….the list continues. I have a STRONG desire to develop an exercise ritual, but get exhausted with the thought of it. How does one exercise when one has no strength? I have yet to fully reconcile this, but I now realize that neglecting myself is no longer optional.

               About Health tells us that self-care makes us better caretakers. They say, “People who neglect their own needs and forget to nurture themselves are at danger of deeper levels of unhappiness, low self-esteem and feelings of resentment. Also, sometimes people who spend their time only taking care of others can be at risk for getting burned out on all the giving, which makes it more difficult to care for others or themselves.” I cannot disagree with this.

               The Bible also tells us that it is important to take care of ourselves. First Timothy 4:14-16 states, “Do not neglect the gift you have, which was given you by prophecy when the council of elders laid their hands on you. Practice these things, immerse yourself in them, so that all may see your progress. Keep a close watch on yourself and on the teaching. Persist in this, for by so doing you will save both yourself and your hearers.” (ESV).

               I must be totally honest with you. I do not want to care about myself. All I want to do is make sure Myles is okay. Myles was born prematurely. He came 12 weeks early, and remained hospitalized for 8 weeks. Babies need our time and energy so that they can become healthy adults. Myles has needed special attention ever since he was born. Along with the regular doctor visits for shots, he had to see a pulmonologist regularly (since his lungs were premature), be evaluated every 6 months to see if he needed therapy, and had to see an eye specialist to make sure he would not have vision problems. And because of the injury he sustained most recently, many more doctors have been added to the list.

               I am exhausted, but SO WHAT? He needs me. It is not fair for a child to go through so much within the first two years of his life. He is so incredibly strong and resilient, and has exceeded the expectations of all who have evaluated him. But as a mother, I don’t know any other option than to go above and beyond what is requested to ensure he will excel.

               But the truth of the matter is, if I am not well I cannot take care of Myles, nor can I pour into others.

               Here is where faith steps in. I have to remember that I am limited by the nature of being human. There is only so much I can do to aid in Myles’ recovery. However, I serve a God without limits. I have had to tell myself that I have to trust that God is doing his part, and I can’t make myself responsible for Myles healing alone. God is there to give me strength AND to heal Myles.

My truth- the day I put Myles into daycare, I had faith that God was going to keep him safe. I prayed over him and trusted that this woman me and his father chose to keep our son safe would do just that. But she didn’t. I absolutely have trust issues now. The thought of putting him into daycare again paralyzes me with fear, so I have no intention of doing so. I believe God saw that Myles and I had the endurance to get through this trial. So, I have extended my faith to God in hopes that he will be our Provider so that I can still take care of Myles the way I did prior to this incident, and I believe He has and will continue. In the meantime, I have to take care of myself a lot better than I have lately.

I believe many of us, especially parents, underestimate the importance of taking care of ourselves. When our bodies are not treated properly, we are unable to give 100% to the people around us. However, when we take a moment to do self-care, we have more than enough for others and ourselves.

About Health suggests these things to do in order to nurture ourselves, and I hope you will join me in doing some, if not all: take a bath, deep condition your hair, deep clean your pores, care for your feet, nourish your skin, tend to your nails, or get a massage. They also suggest that eating a healthy diet, exercising, and getting enough rest will also assist in health and stress management. I would also include meditation and reading the Word of God in this list.

I was so very disappointed in not being able to have the mental or spiritual capacity to write my blog for a couple of days. I am going to do much better for me and for you. I hope you will join me in incorporating more self-care into your daily routine. It’s worth a try. Let’s go!

Peace.

If you have any comments, questions, suggestions, or prayer requests, please feel free to email me at: faithfrfr2014@gmail.com.

Sources:

http://stress.about.com/od/lowstresslifestyle/a/selfcare.htm